Job Application

So today was the first time i put an application in for a job. I am not sure why i haven't done this before now but i did it now...so now i have to do is wait and see...and keep my eyes open for other opportunities...

Jazz Fest

So today I got to spend the day with Adam and Rach. It was a lot of fun. We went to the IMA and spent a lot of time there and then we went out to eat. We went to buca de bepo and that was awesome. We then went to military park for the jazz fest with was so awesome. There is nothing i know that i could compare it to it was that great.
i had a great day with bub and rach.

Dream

So I had a dream last night about my ex. now normally when i have a dream about him i see him within a few days. that makes me uneasy. I am not sure why i have that feeling about it but everytime i see him i get this wierd feeling. I am not sure if it is because deep down inside i still love him or if it is because i broke his heart. I didn't mean to and i know it was self-centered but i did i broke up with him and i am not sure why i think about it all the time. i broke up with him 3 years ago and i am not over it and i don't know why. i have not even been on a date since him. i am afraid of getting that close to someone again. he knew all my secrets and when i broke up with him i was so scared that he was going to tell everyone about my secret but he didn't. But i guess he has moved on and i have not but i don't know how to move on...i mean i broke up with him and i seem to be the only one that got hurt... it has been 3 years but i don't think that right now in my life i could give myself like that. i don't have it in my possessions to be able to give it to anyone...so how do i get it back...it all boils down to one word....rejection

Drive In

So Jd, Cherellie, adam, rach and I went to the drive in tonight to see Sherk 3. And what I could hear of it, it was great. There was this car that park one spot over from us and things were great until their friends showed up in the middle of the movie. So we didn't have a speaker box because ours was broken but we figured it wouldn't be a big deal and it wasn't until the second car showed up. There was several parts of the movie I had no idea what was going on because they were talking over the speakers. So almost the end of the movie one girl screams about how this can't be the end of the movie(if they would have been there at the begining of the movie then they would have known). It was a double feature and I honestly thought about(as we were driving away...since we all have seen PiratesIII) screaming the ending to them and totally ruin the movie for them like they ruined it for us...but i didn't...oh well

6/6

So I guess the place where i work is doing some clean up. They are going to fire 6 people from the front where i work. I am very sad, one of course is my brother then you have someone who has been with the company for 14 years. 14 years is a long time to be with a company and be accused of basically stealing, and that is not what happened...i think it is a bunch of bull crap...i guess i need to polish my cya folder...and start covering my ass...

6/3

At this very moment in time I feel like something just isn't right. I am not sure what but it is the feeling in my gut. Just like something just isn't adding up right. I am not sure why. I have a big test to take on saturday so I guess I better get some more studying in this week, but I don't think that is it. But I really don't know so I guess it could be anything.
My best friend had a baby a few months ago and i feel like we have kinda split ways. I am not sure that this is the right way to say it but i feel like there is more of a distance between the two of us than before. Don't get me wrong i love ava she is beautiful. I just feel like i need to give her the space she needs, i hope this is right because she is my best friend and i have never had a best friend like her before so i hope i am right.

6/2

Today I got to thinking about my papaw(grandpa). It seemed like everything today pointed to him. I am working on a scrapbook in the loving memory of papaw. I think that it has been more of a healing process than anything else. It is just sad that my kids will never know papaw. He was a rough man but he was the sweetest, lovable teddybear. I miss him so much. I think my next page will have something to do with shooting stars and somewhere of the rainbow. I have always thought that the stars are just little hole that the people from heaven look through to see everyone. When the sky is cloudy then it just means that they know we are doing okay. When my great grandpa hill passed away it was the first "real" funeral i went to and i remember the pastor saying something about the stars in heaven. I would stare at the sky at night and just cry. I just wish this was a very bad dream and i will wake up soon, but i know it isn't a dream. He would be so proud of me. I love you papaw.